Wednesday, December 24, 2008

I knew Michael wasn't dead, Speidi and the Hills, and other shit you care about the day before x-mas...

WOW, two posts in a row...I am on a roll here. *silence* Whatever, I care, that's all that matters.

MICHAEL AIN'T SICK...

Photo: Jacked from a fan site, courtesy of Google.com

Why did I pick this picture, you ask? Because I refuse to post pictures of this guy looking like ALF's cousin. If you weren't down with Alf in the late 80s, you are fired from popular culture.



Photo: Jacked from someone's Myspace page

Had to post this, just for kicks.

Yesterday, I gave you some tidbits regarding his health being at a dire low, with speculations from some guy Ian Haperlin (in case you feel googly all over) unauthorized autobiography of his life...because we need to know even more about Michael Jackson than we already know.

I am on the fence with whether I will use this space as a place to bash celebrities...I mean, I work for celebrities to a degree...hell, my sister is a celebrity (even if she's on some people's d-lists, but look what it did for Kathy Griffin). Uh oh, digressing from my point, I tend to do that, it's a Morgendorffer thing...

A few questions after reading this clip (thanks Reuters):

1. Who is Dr. Tohme Tohme, and why would you go see a man who has the same name twice?

2. Who is really qualified to be Michael's doctor? I mean, think about it...


3. LOL at the marketing firm handling this whole affair...I think that's funny, et vous?


I have other questions, but you know, I think Michael Jackson is about as exhausting as it's going to be to return my fabulous too-big shoes back to Macy's today...yeah, I shop there too.

SPEIDI'S CHANGE OF "HEART"

Photo: Getty Images

For all of my friends who are obsessed with the Hills, I've been informed by my wonderful gossip section of my local hometown paper that the Speidi union didn't take place (thanks for the info two days later...we already knew they didn't get married).

Oh, but there was some interesting feedback, like how "official" was this wedding really...um, how fucking official can a reality television wedding be? What the hell were people expecting to see?

Anyway, there was this fabulous party to celebrate the finale, and somehow the producers forgot to invite me...oh well, maybe they will invite me to the finale of Daddy's Girls, since they are black like me.


Photo: MTV.com

Well, I'd love to stay and chat with you more, but I am starving and mom's collard greens and mac and cheese are calling me home...

So that no one's offended...Happy Holidays to all of my 5 readers. For Christmas, I asked Santa for more readers by the end of the year...lol, sike. Black Daria knows who Santa is...

xoxo,
Black Daria ;/

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Stop talking about Michael like he's already dead, and other things to ponder...

So it's a mere two days before Christmas
and all through the streets
I bump into people
And step on their feet

Rushing down 44th Street
trying to make it with care
While idiot tourists
Stop and stare

I wonder "what gives"
As I smirk when they trip
Merry Christmas jerko
Lucky your ass wasn't flipped

That's a Black Daria original...if I see this poem pop up in the next greeting card, I will sue...e-cards included.

OK, so it's been a while since the last post (gosh, that line sounds familiar) but Black Daria can't afford the internet at home, so she's forced to utilize other means, such as work computers, to write posts. So if you work with me and you are reading this, know that my task list is complete hater, so don't go try to report my ass, find something better to do with your time...thanks ;/

Anyway, I have to get going and find some gifts I can afford for less than $10...Black Daria is just as poor as the next one...

Oh wait, some updates:

1. Michael Jackson isn't dead...
yet.
2. I've also wondered about
this, since I feel like I am the only African-American who watches the show...there better be some black bitches in "The City." OK, not bitches, but I needed to emphasize that...

And of course, for those who enjoy watching train wrecks and other nightmares of the sort, here's a video I saw yesterday on RWS (by the way, the Eddie Murphy as "Riddler" claim is false). I wonder about Lil' Miss Kim:



Bah humbug, bitches!

xoxo,
Black Daria ;/

Thursday, December 18, 2008

A brawl at the local club in Brooklyn & a response to rants about the channel that once employed my sister...

It's been a pretty slow news week, but there have been some things worth noting:

HOW BROOKLYN GETS DOWN

I often warn people that if they don't leave me alone, they will get a taste of Crown Heights. My mom and I lived there for about 10 years before we moved to the better neighborhood where I was finally able to watch cable...and I could finally get to see my sister's life in action...

But I digress. This clip was sent to me by a Black Daria reader...and I thought, "Wow, I remember these types of fights..." If you've ever been to a club in Brooklyn specifically, you will see shit like this:




A few things when I look at this mess:

1. What club are they in wearing this type of shit? Hello Skrippers!

2. In the beginning of the video, do you love how they actually have a title of this shit, not to mention, what's a Rumule? Is that like a Rumble, but different because there's Dancehall playing in the back?

3. Wow...so you are bald (lady in pink) and your wig was clearly not on tight enough...shame on you.

4.Where's security?

5. Back to the outfits...this was "shot" on December 5...based on the outfit what kind of coats were you wearing?

Ridiculous.

HILLS HATERS

Believe it or not, my boss sent this clip to me...as a settlement for denying my birth and not giving me any airtime on Daria, the good folks over at MTV gave me a job at a different network...my last name being different also throws people off...and damn it, they owed me...

Back to the point...so it seems that people have figured out that
The Hills is a scripted reality TV show (Duh, my boss knew that though...) and it also seems that people are really sad by what MTV used to be and what it is now...well, get over it. Times have changed, and so have people. If you listen to the music in the show, you may realize that MTV actually does still play music, even if it's not dumbed down in the form of pricey videos...now, I am not just saying this because I work here (OK, fuck it, I am). Stop hating, and take The Hills as a sociology lesson. I hear you laughing over there, but trust me, I studied this in college...no, for real. I don't have time to break it down to you like how we used to in class, but I guarantee this is definitely popular culture at it's best.

OTHER CELEBRITY...NEWS?



According to my friend at Rhymes With Snitch (rhymeswithsnitch.blogspot.com), Eddie Murphy has been cast as "The Riddler" in the next Batman movie...is this a stretch for Eddie? I think he will nail it.

That's all for now...until the next opportunity...

xoxo,
Black Daria :/

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Tuesday is a Music day...and also time for The Hills Recap!

Tuesday sucks...they are nowhere close to Fridays, and generally a sucky day because it comes right after Manic Mondays...but you probably already knew that.

Anyways, since artists usually release new albums on Tuesday, and I like music (yes, I have a few likes) I thought I'd tell you about a few albums, but one I love right now is Brandy's "Human" her fifth album release (I think, let me check...yes, fifth).






Brandy is a girl that's just like you and me...and this album proves that. Beyond her ability to channel her husky voice to sound as tender as baby's skin, she's still got it. My favorite song is A Capella...


I didn't get Keiysha Cole's album yet, although it's already been offered to me from a friend...I am going to be good and go support her...when I listen to it, I will tell you what I think.


THE HILLS...almost a WRAP :(


Believe it or not, Daria has a thing for the Hills...could be because my sister used to come on at the time it now comes on...or I could be tapping into the White side of my family...whatever. This show is a great way for me to live vicariously through others that I really don't aspire to be, but are fun to watch. My top 5 comments are:


1. Why did they bother to show the wedding with Speidi (well, let me not jump to conclusions) I read about two weeks ago...I want them to go away...fast.


2. Whitney got the job! Now I get to be obsessed about a new show called "The City"...it starts December 29th.


3. I think Whitney's dad is cooler than her. Just saying, "Yo, yo..."


4. Can someone explain what Lo's purpose is on this show anymore? I used to like her, but no mas.


5. What's Lauren gonna do now that Whitney's gone from People's Revolution? Guess she will go make some more dresses I can't afford.


For those whom care about this show as much as I do, then you found these comments enlightening. I know you did. You may also want to know the Season Finale is next week, and sure to be a doozy...


If you don't watch the show then you found these comments to be just plain boring.


Guess who doesn't care?
;)
xoxo,
Black Daria

Sunday, December 14, 2008

I wonder if you are ready....I wonder if I am...

Yes bitch, you are reading this correctly. Black Daria is here...

It started when I was in high school...the popular "Daria" series was on MTV...I was just discovering it after my mom got away with telling that little white lie that we couldn't get cable until we moved to the good neighborhood...anyways, one of my buddies would say, "Gosh, you act and sound just like Daria..." I never forgot that, and as I tried to figure out what type of identity I wanted as a blogger, well this seemed perfect...until some hater decided to take the name, so therefore, I got stuck with
onlyoneblackdaria@blogger...but fuck the bitch or ass who took the name, cause there's only one Black Daria, and that's me...so there.

With that, I'd like to start with the best thing that happened this weekend, besides the fact that I turned 30:



A couple things are funny about this video:



1. How long did the secret service agents wait to actually protect the idi-, I mean president? (I know it's supposed to be a capital letter P, but Bush gets no respect from Black Daria).



2. The guy to the right of Bush...think he was in on it?



3. Wish I'd been home when the "Special Report" came in (shout out to Lester Holt for sounding way official, I would have been rolling on the floor and no way could I have reported this with a straight face)...lol, this is Special? I guess it is...but would have been more special if he had actually gotten hit...



4. I am thinking maybe based on how he ducked those shoes, he wasn't all that bad in combat...he just sat on his ass alot.



5. Dude should have had better aim...



Oh well...it was fun to watch ;/



Since this is my first post, you may be wondering what to expect...well, lol...whatever. You may laugh, you may get offended...Black Daria doesn't really care (just so you know).



I just talk about the things that interest me, and figure they may interest you too...if not, you close the window, and move on with your day...and everybody is happy...well, I don't really smile all that much. But if you smile, that's OK.



xoxo,

Black Daria :/