Dear Soulja Boy: Or, can I call you Sloppy Boy?

Dear Soulja Boy:

So, it's bad enough that Kat Stacks exists. But we, the public, accept her, because we all know God likes a good laugh.

But then she comes equipped with fake breasts and a phone. We dare not ask where she learned English, although based on listening to her, I'd have to guess between all the Alien movies, Werewolves, and some dude from Brooklyn. I only say that because she said Yo.

We know a few things after watching this video:

1. You are no longer a welcomed guest at the Intercontinental in Buckhead. Maybe anywhere there's an Intercontinental.

2. Your new name is Sloppy Boy Tell 'Em.

3. Cocaine is a terrible drug. So bad, it makes you do things like this.


Source: WorldStarHipHop.com

Don't worry, your sister Paris followed up your party with her own arrest in Las Vegas. I guess it's safe to assume you are both trying to get this all out of the way before the VMA's and Fashion Week. The season is upon us.

This is bad PR. I advise you to remedy this situation ASAP.

How? Oh, you've got to pay for those types of answers. Gee, I hope your people got skills.

xo,
Black Daria ;/

Dear Paris: Of Course it's not Your Cocaine. Noooo.

Source: Web

Dear Paris:

You know, when you said the pot wasn't yours in South Africa, I didn't believe you, but I believed in the power of your last name, and just like that, it was gone, and you were free.

But then I read on Diary of a Hollywood Street King via TMZ that you got arrested in Las Vegas for possession of cocaine.

Once again, it's not your purse. I ask: "Chum'mon. Really?"

How stupid do you think we really are? Don't worry, if Lindsay only did 13 of her 90 day sentence, you will do at least 7. You've done it before, you know the drill.

I just add you to the list of coke-exposed users for the week. Thanks, I guess this also made it possible for me to write something of interest today.

Actually, you aren't interesting at all, but you are worth discussing for the current moment. I've already gotten up into Soulja Boy, so until something else happens, I'm done discussing this situation.

xo,
Black Daria ;/