@ the VMAs...the performances I cared about...

Just got done watching the performances of the VMAs...the ones that I cared about anyway. Here are my thoughts:


Beyonce's Love is 'Tops'

Get More: 2011 VMA, Music, Beyoncé

I don't know...I won't believe she's preggers until I literally see the first pics that she sells to People Magazine for some astronomical number that should put the kid through college. Normally, I have beef with Beyonce, but now that she's preggers, I guess I am not allowed to say anything bad about her, but for someone in their first trimester, she's certainly comfortable in her heels...still wondering how she got away with performing in NYC at Roseland with no leak of this news. I also appreciate that she's not wearing a leotard...


Jay-Z/Kanye West 'Otis' Performance - Snooze Button...until the 1:57 mark...

Get More: 2011 VMA, Music, JAY Z and Kanye West

I already talked about how I felt about this song...and was still equally underwhelmed by this performance until the random guy came to steal the show...I love how the security guard got all up in the middle of the performance...I think this was planned, but hey...whatever makes the show work, right?


Chris Brown's Still on my Top 3 lists of "Great Entertainers"...

Get More: 2011 VMA, Music, Chris Brown

...no, not all time. Only Michael Jackson can claim that, and he's dead (RIP MJ)...dare I say that it will be a long time before we see that type of talent in our lifetime...but I thought this was creative...the fact that he did a snippet of Teen Spirit made me...never mind...let's just say I REALLY like that song...

Lil Wayne's Autotune Moment

Get More: 2011 VMA, Music, Lil Wayne

Eh...no thanks. Hate that I have to see his blue Polo drawers in this...and I hate the Ronald McDonald shoes...who styled him? I'd fire them...this outfit blows, and was actually distracting...I also didn't really dig the live version of "John"...sometimes that works, in this case...just didn't do it for me. The production of that track is cray (that's the new way to say crazy)...so yeah...eh.

I sifted through the other videos, but I just said no thanks. Still trying to figure out what the deal with Lady Gaga's outfit was...was she channeling MJ and Amy Winehouse at the same time?

Seems like the show wasn't heavily driven towards the performances...for some reason, I expected to see more of the video winners perform...seemed kinda strange, but I didn't watch the show from start to finish, so maybe there was a rhyme and reason to it. I did love the stage, and I always love how the producers find a way to incorporate the fans. You also gotta love the influence Twitter has, with the implanted #VMA hashtag...

So yeah, what did you think?

xo,
Black Daria ;/

Dear Beyonce: So What If No One Came To Your Birthday Party

Source: Rhymes With Snitch

Dear Beyonce:

I know why so many of your so called celebrity friends didn't show up to your birthday party last week, where you did NOT turn 29 years old. Please stop lying.

You didn't sing on the tribute to We Are The World, and quite frankly, this is why no one cared to celebrate your birthday. Now, I know it sounds pretentious, but I am still not buying Jay-Z's comments claiming that the original was untouchable.

Simply put, you thought you were too high saddidy to come out for Michael, and now you are being returned the favor by the universe.

Suck it up. I'm sure you had a good time and the next excuse will be that it was meant to be a private affair.

Either way, I am gagging in disgust.

xo,
Black Daria ;/

Dear Kanye: Thank You For Revisiting Bitchassness. So...now what?

Source: Rhymes With Snitch

Dear Kanye:

About a year ago, I wrote about a bitchass that was in my life. I then started to focus my attention on you, because unlike this guy, you actually had opportunity to move people with your talents, and people actually knew your name.

Instead, you jumped on stage last year at the VMAs, and you decided that you were going to basically ruin Taylor Swift's moment. Why?

Because you weren't on Facebook.

Then you denounced Twitter, wondering why all you friends were getting more acclaim. Soulja Boy what? Fabolous said what? Ice T is on Twitter?

Then you realized you weren't on Twitter, and that was dumb.

And then MTV research execs delivered last year's numbers to the producers. And guess what? They realized that your tomfoolery should be part of this year's awards, because let's face it, everyone loves a good train wreck. And people at MTV REALLLLLLY need their jobs right now.

I promise you that somewhere, there's one guy on the staff that REALLY hopes you show up drunk.

Do me a favor. Do whatever the hell you want. Between this and G.O.O.D. Fridays, I just can't wait to see what you will tweet next.

Oh, and to answer the question you asked earlier...no, I would not want you to walk up to me and try to apologize for basically being a jackass when there are HUNDREDS, if not THOUSANDS of children who lost a parent, and just had to suck that shit up.

Kick rocks, Kanye.

xo,
Black Daria ;/

P.S. Next time, don't be a BITCHASS. Tweet Taylor Swift directly. And no, don't go looking to see if I follow her.

Dear Mathew, Confirmed: You Are Beyonce's Pimp.

Source: Just Jared

Dear Mathew:

It's without timing, but an announcement was made yesterday that you are basically still Beyonce's pimp, will always be her pimp, and will always have a hand in her earnings, because you made her, and that's just the way it is.

I don't recall, but I think it's safe to assume that everyone knows this already. No one can do what you've done with the Beyonce brand.

Thanks for clearing all of that up. Ask me if I really care.

The answer is no, but I felt you were still worthy enough to receive a letter from me. Now, carry on with signing off on more endorsements that she doesn't need to be part of, and burn her out by 2013.

We will all watch in annoyance.

xo,
Black Daria ;/

Dear Jay-Z: A Tisket, A Tasket, A Mistress...

Source: Diary of a Hollywood Street King

Dear Jay:

Uh Oh. Seems the secret is out...or is it?

Like "Where's Waldo" it's been reported that your mistress Cathy "Kori" White, and her good friend, Claudia Jordan, are here partying with you. Which must mean that you are having an affair with Kori. I mean, Duh, right? Especially since this said mistress reached out to my friend Jacky to ask him to remove her pictures she left open for the world to copy on Facebook.

As I recall, Beyonce was gallivanting about with her fine ass bodyguard, whatever his name is...so why can't/shouldn't you also have your own piece...of action?

I am thinking it's basically impossible to keep it in your pants when you sit at your current stature. Let's face the facts, you basically have women throwing themselves at you.

Couples within your stature must have arrangements. So it's obvious that you would have an appropriate person to be part of said arrangement.

Personally, I think Beyonce's bodyguard wins. This chick looks like the modern female cornball who happens to have a famous friend. I guess with stints on shows like Let's Make A Deal, you too, could find yourself in a position to argue with bloggers about stories regarding your friends that you find unsavory.

Just want you celebrities (that's what you are called) and starlet whores (what I call some of you) to remember that it's these bloggers you talk about that actually help you keep your jobs of being known, otherwise no one would know what common hooker trash looked like.

One day, I will have a positive post. Until then, I say: Whatever. Next. Isn't everyone a jump off these days?

xo,
Black Daria ;/

Last Week on the Black Daria Files...

I talked about a few things of interest to you, because you care, such as:

Bey's Beauty Center...or something.

Courtesy of DimeWars

Mr. & Mrs. Jay-Z's visit to the White House and a Center Grows in Brooklyn...




So Beyonce puts on her good samaritan hat yet again and opens a center in Brooklyn aimed at teaching men and women Cosmetology skills to become active members of society. I wonder if she will open nail and hair salons so these people have places to work. Or at least teach them how to "get a chair" at some of these places without getting laughed at because no one believes their official graduate certificate from the Beyonce Cosmetology Center. I guess that warrants a trip to see the President, who was able to make an impromptu visit with Bey. Don't be a Marilyn Monroe. That's all I'm saying.


NIVEA GETS CONJUGAL WITH LIL' WAYNE


So you wonder what Lil' Wayne did before he reported to Jail Monday morning? Since the courtroom caught fire causing smoke damage and other nonsense, his sentencing was delayed, so your hard tax dollars paid for Lil' Wayne to make nice with at least one of his misses before reporting for duty. It's been reported that Wayne has requested seclusion. Duh.


Source: D-Listed


JERMAINE'S BAD ASS KIDS


Seems Jermaine needs to focus on something else besides Reality Shows and a Concert Tour. Apparently it's OK to not only tape these kind of offenses, but then allow them to be leaked on the Internets. SMH.


ALLEN IVERSON'S WIFE FILES FOR DIVORCE





Source: Fine Google skills

Attention Groupies and Starlet Whores. Seems Tawanna had enough of the shenanigans of the AI. That and the money pot is starting to dry up (who is he playing for again? Oh right, no one.) Either way, he's getting a divorce. Old news to some of you whom have already tried to reach out to him, knew to those whom didn't read it elsewhere yet.

CHILLI LOOKS FOR WHAT SHE WANTS...


And I hope her stank ass finds it. You should watch the trailer so you can decide for yourself, but Chilli has some deeper issues; some that I actually think affect many Black Women. I wonder if Tionna Smalls can save the day with some advice to Chilli...I think she appears hopeless, but this one will be worth a watch.

Catch more on the Black Daria Files Friday Special by clicking here.

xo,
Black Daria ;/

Dear Jay-Z, Beyonce, Alicia Keys and Lady Gaga: a "not so nice" letter

Dear Beyonce, Jay-Z,Alicia Keys & Lady Gaga,

Sup my peoples. I've been notified that you were conveniently "unavailable" for the 25th anniversary of the "We Are The World" for Haiti recording.


Note: For the record, please scan for those whom made it to this..."thing."

Now, I know what you're about to say...my response is to "shut the fuck up and listen."

Now, for a little history sake, just would like you to know something, as I can tell some of you skipped a few classes in middle school..and you additionally weren't paying attention to popular culture.

Michael Jackson singlehandedly saved MTVs ass. Yes, ONE VIDEO. Followed by others, of course. When launched in August 1981, MTV showed promise to be a destination for all things music.

But there was a problem...

And that problem was that the radio dial had many stations. Not everyone was into Rock post-disco era...this "Pop" thing was making a rise. And the customer was most important at that time. MTV was a baby as far as pay-for-tv services were concerned.

I'm sure Jay you can relate...cable was JUST being installed in my neighborhood of Crown Heights in the early 90s...in the 80s, our demo was an afterthought.

Until MJ...he paved the way for "different" music.

Because of MJ, many other types of music essentially landed on the channel, and shows like "Yo MTV Raps" were created.

Let's add onto this: as a humanitarian, no one has come close to MJ. He selflessly gave back to those who needed it most, and was happy to bring joy to anyone's life, even though he could never have the peace we earned as human beings.

So I ask, what EXACTLY is your fucking excuse? You didn't get it? Wanna show MJ up? You'll have to do alot to get to that status, I don't give a flying ringding fignooty (my mother made that up) what you've done "since MJ"...with your generation/s (yeah, Jay makes it so) especially, there would be no "you" without MJ.

You're fucking ridiculous.

Respectfully,
Black Daria ;/

Since EVERY other F'ing blogger is gonna post it...

So will i...why not get a few freaking hits on my blog too?

I still think that Beyonce is too much. I also like the Sweet Dreams video better than this one, even though that one looks like the other four she did before that one.

But I digress from my point.


Beyonce, featuring Lady Gaga. Here's how I imagined this went down:

To: Bey
Date: September 14, 2009
Time: 1:04 PM
From: Gagabitches


Hey Bey-

Can I call you that now? Good seeing you at the show last night. So, I'm rethinking this whole Kanye tour after the stunt he pulled. Hope my management gets on that before they start releasing the promos, although you know shit like that makes for good press.

Anyway, let me get to the point. After your father practically squeezed my ass several times to get my attention despite my security... Your father Matthew (nice man, please send him my regards) suggested I speak to you about a duet. He thinks it would be big for both of us.

Maybe we'll go on tour?

Let's do lunch.

~GGbitches

**********************
From: Bey
To: Gagabitches
Date: September 15, 2009
Time: 2:12 PM


Dear Lady Gaga-

Please be advised that this is Beyonce's assistant typing for her, as she does not care to type unless necessary. She's also not very smart, and couldn't write a sentence to save her ass, however, she's gifted and I'm honored to work with her.

As per your request, Beyonce's management will be in touch soon. As soon as we find a song to recycle, we will schedule a call with your people immediately.

As per Beyonce, she "Will pass on lunch. I'm not as desperate as Ciara yet, and I'd rather pull that Trump card later." (Sorry, she makes me write these things.)

Sincerely,
Beyonce's Assistant (awaiting her clearance on calling her Bey, please refrain until obtaining notice, as per her lawyer who reads every email I write.)

************************

Well, you be the judge on the end product. Courtney Brown, my co-host on Thursday's Return of the Black Daria Files radio show, seems to like Bey, and no likey Gaga.

I think everyone knows how I feel about this, and I think it may have been a reach to get Taylor Swift. Or something.

Your thoughts?



xoxo,
Black Daria ;/

EXCLUSIVE:"Keeping it Real, Whitney" - Special Guest, Debra Lee - Chairman and CEO, BET

Letters poured into "Keeping it Real, Whitney" asking why she, the greatest love of all singer of contemporary music, wasn't at the BET Awards on Sunday, June 29, 2009.

So Whitney did what any good talk show host should do: invite the person who was behind the show to come to hers and answer some questions.

There were tons of issues, but Whitney touched on a few in this exclusive interview with Debra Lee, Chairman and CEO of BET. And I know Debra Lee isn't graying by any means. I've seen her wig up close and she keeps it tight. Xtranormal doesn't have many options for older black women, but that's OK, you'll forget all of that as soon as Whitney gets to the bottom of things.



Enjoy.

xoxo,
Black Daria ;/

Black Daria Case Study: Beyonce - Appendix A: Sasha Fierce Fashion Line

Well, every case study should have a good appendix, so here's one:





Introducing Sasha Fierce, the clothing line. By the way, this is a Back-to-School collection...wholesome, isn't it? Perfect for seducing your teacher into the A you knew you deserved, I mean, why not?

New York Magazine probably wouldn't have much to say good about Beyonce doing a fashion line since they cater to those who basically live on the upper east and west sides of Manhattan, along with the hip Subscribers and libraries around the country who subscribe to them, but here's their take on the whole thing. I guess I would be OK with this (such a lie) if this were for girls going to the club, and being sold at Fredericks of Hollywood, or Pretty Girl on Jamaica Ave. Hell, this is even Macy's...right next to the Pastry section...except...

What age group is wearing this? Sorry, my mom wouldn't have let this go down, and I made quite a few risky fashion moves in high school. I was definitely a 90s girl, thigh-high tights and all...nothing like my sister's Doc Martens.

I think this will be in my local El Mundo (only people who live Uptown in Harlem, Washington Heights or the Bronx know what this place is) or TJ Maxx by next summer.

xoxo,
Black Daria ;/

"When Whitney met Beyonce" - A Black Daria Film

I couldn't help myself...I mean, how could I not make one of my own...besides, the news is very boring right now...I could careless that Rihanna canceled her concerts because she wants to frollock on the beach with her Dexter St. Jock...could give a flying fignooty, because anytime somebody talks about this no-talent trash, she gets paid...even now...so...

onto the movie, entitled "When Whitney meets Beyonce" - A Black Daria Film

Only proper that I set you up like they do at a television pitch:

Beyonce is leaving her concert at MSG, parading through the streets of NYC in celebration of her awesome show, when she bumps into Whitney Houston in Times Square. Annoyed by the skip to her do-dah, Ms. Houston has a few words with Ms. Knowles about the business of music...

I mean, again, I just couldn't resist. Enjoy the show.



Fin,
Black Daria

Appendix A: Black Daria Case Study on Beyonce

I'm not really sure where this goes. All I know is when I saw it, I wondered if someone had been inside my head or something...LOL.

Guess I will call it Appendix A to the Black Daria Case Study on Beyonce.

BRANDY VS. BEYONCE

Courtesy of MTO, via genus101 on Youtube

You already know how I feel about this one right? Remember, I told you who I loved a long time ago. Since I'm beat, I figured this should hopefully suffice, as you forgive me as I try to keep my job in this recession while staying relevant. Tough business.

xoxo,
Black Daria

Sunday night at Shrine: A Date with Harlem

I'd been wanting to check out TreZure the Empress for a while, but it was a conversation with a good friend that solidified the deal for my "Date with Harlem" at Shrine this past Sunday...not known for the best sound system, but I couldn't pass up the artists on the show list.

A teacher? Really? After her performance she says outside, "Yes, I specifically teach music of the African Diaspora." I was sold on teacher, but the African Diaspora part was a cool add to a list of accomplishments.

Photo: TreZure and the band, taken by Black Daria

TreZure delivers to a crowd. Kicking off her set with a couple of what appear to be "crowd favorites," (watching audience response is a good thing) she's certainly takes you on a journey with her lyrical abilities, touching the end of her set with a sexy Afro-Cuban vibe...keywords in her set were love, and her red dress, color-popping make-up job and white shoes reminded me of what maybe Billie Holiday or Dinah Washington would look like if they were performing today...reincarnated voice reminds me of many ancestors...I was sold. Check out some of her "TreZures" here.

The host was Crash of the "Pop Champagne" video...I assume the association was Harlem. That's all I should probably say about her, to be nice today...but one comment from a crowd member was "She's weird." Eh...whatever. I guess she's a pretty girl, so that helps things. And if it were a music video, and she had the pink wig she referred to, maybe one of the white people there would have known that, otherwise it was pretty irrelevant. As a black girl, I kinda just felt like I would have left that out, and mentioned it to those who asked "What videos?" off stage.

I ran into Charles of Hustlemode later who told me I was on the list, but I wasn't tripping as Black Daria believes in supporting events, as opposed to free rides when it comes to shows to feed artists specifically, to be clear. Otherwise, I love a good sponsored party or album release with an oper bar just like the next guy.

I'll also refrain from where things went after that and in between...not even the distracting event support handling the run of show could interrupt what I heard, although I felt the hectic energy at points, and even stepped out for a few cigarettes on their behalf. Yes, smoking is bad for your health, and I am quitting on May 15, 2009. Next. Somehow, I always end up saying the shit I didn't want to say...oh well.

The good news is Peter Hadar saves the day...and not by outshining TreZure, but by just being Peter. Knowing him from his humble beginnings, I was impressed with how far he's come. I got to chat with him briefly about his experience at SXSW recently, which he enjoyed...now just ready for labels to recognize his talents...wish someone would...he was the perfect ending to chaotic interludes. I've featured him on all of my Black Daria Files radio shows...check out more of Peter here. He helped to make me not so mad about the show, or stimulating the bar with dollars to pass the time due to...damn it, there I go again...note to self, nobody is perfect. These two artists were certainly the highlights.

Here's a slice of what you missed...he requested the lights be low for this one...so you'll have to just listen to what we were hearing and seeing amongst the blue hue...

PETER HADAR, "PLANETS" @ SHRINE - APRIL 26, 2009

A tout a l'huere...off to check out another party...back onto my Beyonce case study soon...If you didn't hear already, Obssesed sold $28.5 million. Good job Bey, but I am still not really impressed. I'll tell you why on Entry 2 of my case study, which requires me to go and actually watch the movie.

xoxo,

Black Daria

Black Daria Case Study...on Beyonce: Entry #1

Sitting here catching up on my favorites, I couldn't help but notice a commercial, and it caught the corner of my eye, because I realized that this could not be...nope, it's not...

Beyonce?

NINTENDO DS - BEYONCE



So, I say to myself out loud, "Really? Same girl who said Twitter? She reserves that to her sister, she doesn't know about all of that twitter mess. OK, not like that, but if you scroll down to Monday, April 20 on RWS this is what she said.

So that was Tuesday, and I kept it moving, you know me, couple of facebook status updates...and they brought me to a revelation: Black Daria should do a case study on Beyonce.

Think about it...Emporio Armani one day, then Loreal...list goes on...this woman is very serious. Bitches (yes, one of yous) are mad about this...but you know, so far, I've thought of the strategy of the reversal of Beyonce (I mean, let's face it, we are facing a slippery slope with some of our Black entertainers right now I'd list names but that's not the point here).

Wednesday...now watching the back up episode of Real Housewives of NYC; I wasn't really paying attention to (so tired from work) so I was doing some work when surprise: Beyonce, but now with...Daniel, son of Solange (hey, I kinda like that).

Back on Youtube and what do you know...there's this interesting clip...all about how they came up with this commercial:

BEYONCE FOR NINTENDO DS WITH JUELZ - MAKING THE COMMERCIAL

Points on this one:

1:00 - She's trying to get the rhythm on the game, but she can't swing it, so in comes someone to try to help her but hey, I would probably need help on this kiddie contraption...gosh TWO screens? She already doesn't like Twitter.

At 2:30, she goes into signing campaign mode on a bunch of Nintendo DS's which I assume will end up on some exec's desk at Nintendo, as some assistant opens the box, wishing they could give something like that to their kid...not in NYC, of course. You know not one kid would survive in NYC with Bey's signature...what kid wouldn't brag about it, then get jumped 2.5 secs later?

2:45: Enter cute kid, Juelz...awww. He is cute :)

5:55: Liked doing the gig because she liked not having to "think too much." She said that, you ask yourself what context that was supposed to be taken.

"Time out," I said under my breath"...who's doing the PR for this...and is it about the game?" Beyonce and her relationship with her nephew...feels forced...like I am sure she does spend time with him...but the words feel contrived...she had to remember to say the word "stylus" and seemed proud when she did remember the word.

Answers revealed at the end of the video if you watched the whole thing. You go do your own Googling on the company name that appears on the end...oh, maybe those two dudes will even send you one of those Nintendo DS systems she signed.

Up next: Beyonce at the movies...yeah, maybe I will catch Obsession this weekend.

xoxo,
Black Daria