Justin Bieber: Are you serious?

Justin,

I'm not bothering with any salutations, buddy. You have turned into quite the little prick. I just happened to stumble across this video yesterday in my timeline, and needless to say, I wasn't surprised to see your responses:

A few questions:

1. Are you really popping your collar? That stopped in the early 2000's, I am pretty sure of that fact. Might have even been before you were born.

2. Are you high during this deposition? Did Lil' Wayne and your new hip-hop crew tell you it's best to do these types of interviews when you are under the influence?

3. You don't get to object a question. See that guy sitting next to you? He's your attorney, and that's his job.

I'm done with this. Even Usher wants nothing to do with you right now. 

You do have enough money to retire now. Might want to think about it.

Best,
Black Daria

sources: Hollywood Life, TMZ

Dear Chris: You really need a Girlfriend, huh?

Hi Chris,

So, you really needed to find a way to get a new girlfriend or boyfriend, eh? I don't know if this is genius or not, but I do know this:

If all these girls have to do is add 8 + 2 (click on photo to see this question), take a nice photo, and maybe have a decent following on FB, IG and Twitter...then we've got a problem, Houston. Big. Freaking. Problem.

What happened to good old captcha?

I'd just rather you focus on your album, but hey, I guess your problems are those of rich people.

Fine. But 8 + 2 will always equal 10 so...

Best,
Black Daria

source: RWS

Dear Drake & Rihanna: Are You Dating? Again?

Dear Drake and Rhianna:

Let me just hit the snooze button on this now, but Rihanna has been spotted on Drake's tour:

1. Amsterdam

2. Brussels

Where to next, lovers? Oh wait, this is just another publicity stunt. Carry on.

Best,

Black Daria

source: RWS

Dear Jimmy: Mistrial?

Dear Jimmy,

Great day for you, huh? Seems your trial ended in a hung jury, as no one could figure out your involvement in the murder of Lowell Fletcher.

Not to worry, somewhere the prosecution is coming up with a plan and will be trying to sue you. So don't throw that "I'm Staying Home" party yet. 

Best,

Black Daria

P.S. Is Czar Entertainment still relevant? *googles* Oh.  

source: StupidDope

Dear Michael: Are you the Father?

So apparently, Michael Jackson really did have sex, contrary to popular belief. Not only that, he has a son...at least this is what's popping up on all the blogs, because there's just nothing left to talk about. Fuck Ukraine, I guess. I'm not saying that, I am saying this is what people are saying to themselves, and fortunately, this story isn't trending on my Facebook timeline...

Meet aspiring (which is why this is really happening) R&B singer B. Howard. He's now backing up on his claim that Michael is his father, but I must say, that jaw line is very Michael...and Randy.

So, do you think this is the one? Cause we all know that Paris, Prince and Blanket are adopted.

Best,
Black Daria

Dear Ashanti: Please fire your Stylist...

Dear, dear Ashanti:

Now, I know you are out here trying to make a comeback, but this outfit is screaming Tina Knowles.

Don't lie, she made this for Destiny's Child, and they just never wore it.

Your stylist is fired.

Best,

Black Daria

source: Cocofab

Dear Patti: What in the Kitty Cat?

Hi Patti,

You don't know me, and I've been on a hiatus, but I came across this picture on TMZ and couldn't help myself. I had to post it.

I don't personally own a fur coat, but if I did, I am not sure if this is the one I'd pick. I can hear my friends already screaming about animal rights, and this coat makes me not blame them, not one bit.

True, you are a legend. I even love your cookbook. But this coat...it's just...

...I hate it. You will always be fly, but not this coat.

Best,

Black Daria

source: TMZ